Saturday, December 27, 2008

We're becoming shut ins

So, we decided not to travel about 60 miles to a family thing tonight. No biggie, right? Well, other family members are doing it and they have three times as far to go.

I think the family thinks we're a bunch of jerks (or they just blame me as I'm the inlaw).

But, here's the deal. Charming here sees all the accidents every day. He knows who was killed where, how, when and what the weather was like. He knows that often you don't need to worry about yourself, but about the other idiot on the road driving too fast, to crazy, too drunk. And he doesn't want to travel a distance in crappy weather.

More knowledge changes what we do. Sometimes I miss the old days when we would drive in a blizzard just because we wanted pizza THAT BAD.

But I like living safer better. I think. And if we aren't the life of the party anymore... oh well.

Monday, December 22, 2008

Police family

Something that really frustrates me is the lack of closeness in my local police family. Sure, some of us hang out and are pretty tight, but it seems like egos and politics or personal beefs seem to screw things up sometimes.
I'll be frank, there are some members of my local police family that I don't adore. But here's the deal... like them or not, if someone rips on them I'm going to stick up for them. I wish I knew they would do the same for me.
I've tried to have get togethers, wife things... anything to bring the local cop wives closer together. Some people play along, but it's the same group. I'd like to incorporate everyone and really have a tight cohesive department. We're small enough that I think it would really benefit everyone. But, I can't figure out how to do it. Maybe some people will just never join in the fun and I need to accept that and move on.
Not really sure where I'm going with this, but I wanted to just vent I think.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Protecting my kids and not being a crazy lady

This is the part of that thin blue line I always fall off of.

How far is too far? When am I not just protective, but waaaay over protective?

Sometimes I think it is better NOT to know what is in my town, on my block, right next door... but at the same time I'm grateful for the knowledge.

The locals here really make me mad because they down play the dangers to our kids. I have a few friends in situations where there is a dangerous person living in close proximity to them... someone who the police really could and should protect them from... but nothing can be done. Why? Because the public has tied their hands by refusing to report things. Because they don't want to be "bad neighbors".

What neighbor is worse? The one who reports a potential child abuser or the one who says nothing and then a child is abused?

All of this is weighing heavily on me this week as I'm trying to decide what to do with a person at church who is just being a bit too friendly to my 3 year old. I don't really think anything bad could come of it, but the behavior is TOO familiar for my taste and I worry about my boy being too lax down the road with someone who could hurt him. Plus, I don't know this specific person from Adam and frankly, I don't really want too.

Don't want to hurt feelings, but I do want this person to back off a bit from my child.

Also don't want to stir things up because in a small town it ALWAYS turns into a cop family vs. town situation.

Gotta love small towns.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Shoulda screened the call...

Finally, Sam told me he was taking a day off and it happened. I need to work myself and he promised to take the baby and 3 year old so I could get someting done. It's been a few weeks of attempts and it finally happened!

Well, first he went to work at 8am, then he came home at noon and so then it happened.

Then the phone rang and I screened it, but when it was another leo, I handed the phone over (you have no idea how important it is to screen calls so all the neighbors don't ask their personal cop questions and/or for favors when they are home). Anyhow, 2 seconds later, I get THE FACE, the, "I'm sorrys" and a door shutting.

Then I see him again around 6pm for a quick bite to eat (because I insisted he eat or hurt my feelings) and I saw him again at midnight.

To make up for it he took today off.

Guess where he is right now?

I'm not mad, I know it isn't his fault. But I do think that the criminals in the area coordinate their shenannigans for when they know it will screw me over. I kid... I think.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

I know who you are

Something I loathe about being married to a cop in a tiny town is that everyone "knows" my family.

People I've never met just start talking to me about my husband.

People ask me about things that are personal to me and I don't even know their name... half the time they don't know my first name, they just call me "Tower's wife".

If I say or do anything it goes through the town faster just because my husband is more "high profile" of a person due to his job and the size of our town. (I pretend it is because I am a rock star, but alas, I know the truth)

I've tried to embrace this lack of privacy, this creepy feeling of everyone knowing things about me when I don't know them from Adam, but it remains. I don't like it.

I need a place to scream...

So here I am.

For better or for worse, this is my little corner to roar when I need it.